Picture this.
I’d just got back from my morning run with the dog. Middle aged man, lycra on. No, don’t go there.
Anyway…
Across from where I live there’s a little green park area. I noticed a couple of gardeners had just arrived, getting tools out of their van.
I strolled up to them, asked “here to mow the lawns are you guys?”
“Yep”, they said, probably expecting me to start nagging at them. “Make sure you do this right this time” or similar.
Then these words came out my mouth, and I was as surprised as they were…
“If you fancy a cup of tea guys, I’ll bring some over. I just live here.”
Their faces lit up. “Thank you, that would be great.”
Then I smiled, walked back in, made some brews and took them over.
Job done.
Here’s what struck me about that little episode that took all of about 30 seconds and a couple of cuppas.
- It was free – didn’t cost me a thing
- It made me feel great
- By the look on their faces, it made them feel good too
Lets call these random acts of kindness.
I like to think it started a tiny chain reaction of good will. Maybe next time one of those guys is in a situation where they could make a random act of kindness, maybe they’re more likely to?
Here’s the thing:
If that was a friend instead of a gardener I’d never met before, I’d have done the same.
Why does that courtesy only have to apply to friends?
It doesn’t. It shouldn’t.
After all, look at us from a distance and we’re a spec of dust in an infinite universe. Regardless of whether someone is a friend or not, we’re all “friends.”
Here’s one of the best pictures ever taken. I think it might be the best for it’s mind-bending effect.
The photo even has a name, Pale Blue Dot. Its a photograph of Earth taken on February 14, 1990, by the Voyager 1 space probe from over 6 billion kilometers away. The furthest away picture ever taken.
In a beam of light, how unbelievably beautiful that is.
Ok, back to random acts of kindness, cos lets face it…may as well be nice, we’re all nothing in the grand scheme of things.
Unless you’re religious, or believe in the simulation, but that’s for another time.
What could we do?
Lets have a think:
- unexpectedly compliment someone about how they look – e.g., “that really suits you” (not in the “suits you” way like from The Fast Show – well, maybe a bit ;p).
- tell someone they did something good – big up to my friend Darren here, who randomly told me how impressed he was I’d got through a tricky work situation.
- unexpectedly tell someone about how special a person they are – e.g., “I really appreciate you as a friend”. Someone said this to me a few months ago (it’s rare!) and I still remember how good I felt. I have since said this to other friends who have similarly almost broken into tears just hearing me say it!
- calling someone out of the blue for a natter (an old friend, a distant relative). Even just someone you communicate a lot with via text, trying calling them.
- offer to help someone out the blue. In business, it could be introducing someone you know to someone else.
- gift someone a book with your thoughts on why they may like it.
- buy someone a random drink (try it at the bar with the bartender, “get yourself one too”). My mate Edd does that all the time, and that’s why every bartender knows his name!
- being friendly and nice to random people you encounter in your day to day life. Living in cities can make you think ignoring people is the way to behave. It’s not. The minute you spend time in more rural areas you realise how nice it is just to chat to strangers!
So many of these things we don’t do out of awkwardness, especially if you’re British. It’s easier not to.
But, let me remind you…
Pale Blue Dot.
Song Recommendation – (Burgs – Mt. Wolf)
Featuring a gorgeous discourse from spiritual teacher and meditation expert Guy Burgs, this is awesome.
“The chance to be part of this happens briefly. The invitation is not to show how inventive and imaginative you are, but how much you can notice what you’re already part of. And appreciate it and share it. And care about those who are around you. Look out for their welfare while you’re looking out for your own. That’s it. Then you’ll get to the end of it having had an awesome time, knowing that’s something you’d recommend to others.”
