Picture this.
I’d just got back from my morning run with the dog.
Across from where I live there’s a little green park area.
I noticed a couple of gardeners had just arrived, getting tools out of their van.
I strolled up to them, asked “here to mow the lawns are you guys?”
“Yep”, they said, probably expecting me to start nagging them, “make sure you do this or that.”
Then these words came out my mouth, and I was as surprised as they were.
“If you fancy a cup of tea guys, I’m just over here.”
Their faces lit up. “Thank you, that would be great.”
Then I smiled and walked back in.
Here’s what struck me about that little episode that took all of about 30 seconds.
- It was free – didn’t cost me a thing
- It made me feel great
- By the look on their faces, it made them feel good too
Lets call these random acts of kindness.
Not only did I get a buzz from it (pushed me out of my comfort zone), I like to think it started a tiny chain reaction of good will.
Maybe next time one of those guys is in a situation where they could make a random act of kindness, maybe they’re more likely to.
This sounds a bit over the top, but it isn’t: They make the world feel like a better place.
If that was a friend instead of a gardener I’d never met before, I’d have gone over and said the same. Why does that courtesy only have to apply to friends?
It doesn’t.
Why don’t we do more of them?
I’m not sure. I think it’s awkwardness on the most part.
From what I can tell, 99% of people you meet are good at their core.
If you have family and you want the best for them, you’ve already bought into society.
It’s because “that’s not what most people do.”
Maybe the most universal random act of kindness is holding a door open for someone. That’s pretty much universal as far as I can see. If you’re halfway through a doorway and there’s someone coming the other way, or coming behind you, you gesture to keep the door open (just in case you needed that explaining :-))
But what other things could we do?
Lets have a think:
- unexpectedly complimenting someone about how they look – e.g., “that really suits you”
- unexpectedly complimenting someone about something they did – e.g., “I think it’s really amazing how you handled that”
- unexpectedly complimenting someone about how special a person they are – e.g., “I really appreciate you as a friend” (someone said this to me a few months ago and I still remember how special I felt. I have since said this to other friends who have similarly almost broken into tears just hearing me say it!)
- calling someone out of the blue (an old friend, a distant relative, even just someone you communicate a lot with via text, but this time you actually call them)
- introducing someone you know to someone else (this is a “power move” in the business world), e.g., “Joe, meet James, he’s a brilliant graphic designer I’d like you to meet”
- gift someone a book with your thoughts on why they may like it
- buy someone a random drink (try it at the bar with the bartender, “get yourself a pint too”)
What else have I missed?